November 21, 2008

Gobble, er, Oink

Filed under: writing — unwriter1 @ 3:11 pm
Tags: , ,

It’s almost Cranberry sauce and pass that drumstick please day. Enjoy how one ole bird beat the odds.



A turkey story
“Hey Tom, somebody’s looking for ya.”

“Ya, I know, now get outta here while I’m getting dressed.”

“Ha Ha, that’s what you’re wanted for, someone wants to see you dressed.”

“Yeah, I know, that’s why I’m getting dressed.”

“You look like a real dork in that pig suit.”

“I’d rather swim in mud than gravy.”

So it was, Old Tom, dressed as a nice, fat, pig, joined the smaller piglets. He was too small to fit with the old bores, er, boars but looked like a large piglet. It was November and time for all the relatives to bore, I mean, keep each other company over a nice juicy turkey. He knew he would be safe this year. He watched Grandpa go heads over tail feathers the previous year. Tom had no plans to lose his mind worrying about it. He had other plans.

“Hey Martha, how many of those dadblamed relatives are coming this year?”

“Well, let’s see, cousin Tilly has four kids and three of the grands. Aunt George is bringing her bunch, around seven. Your brother and his brood were planning on mooching, I mean, stopping by. Ma is coming by and bringing her latest catch and that crowd. Guess we’re up to about thirty.”

“Ok, I’ll git the punkins in fer ya.”

Max had to get the pumpkins because to make that many pies took a bit of doing. He had already brought in a bushel of apples. He had conned, er, talked his brother and his wife into the sweet ‘taters. Everyone else was bringing something. But now came the real problem. There weren’t enough birds to feed all the turkeys coming this year. He thought about a nice roast, but it just didn’t fit the holiday. Well, since they were hosting the festivities, they might as well ham it up as best they could. He knew those hogs, er, relatives, could really pig out. Wow! An idea.

He knew what supper would be, do you?



  1. Why doesn’t he go out and shoot some “wild” turkeys? Or the one dressed up like a pig.

    Comment by Jean Henry Mead — November 21, 2008 @ 3:31 pm | Reply

  2. Cute story, Ron.

    Comment by Lillie Ammann — November 22, 2008 @ 4:44 am | Reply

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