UNWRITER Ron Berry

February 15, 2009

Unanswered Questions

Filed under: humor — unwriter1 @ 5:01 pm

“What the…?”

“What’s the problem Jim?”

“I was taking a walk during my break. But when I stepped on that sidewalk across the street, it started to vibrate and acted like Mrs. Cavendish when she was pregnant. I stepped back onto the street and it seemed to settle down.”

“Ok Jim. When you get off the phone, get a cold drink because the heat is getting to you.”

“I’m not the only one that’s noticed this Penny.”

He was right. The sidewalks around the area were acting funny. It wasn’t long before word got out. People started coming to the area to check it out. It was getting to the point where it was dangerous for traffic. The police finally had to close the area off. They then barricaded the sidewalk.

No one paid any attention to the company that was next to this odd piece of concrete. All everybody noticed was this sidewalk was getting worse. Somebody said if cement could talk, it would not be a nice area for kids. Someone else suggested aliens. People were abuzz for a while but soon they learned to just ignore it. That is they did, until one very strange Monday morning.

Jim was a line foreman so he had to be on the job before everyone else. After parking in the company lot, he headed for his office. He noticed it. That funky sidewalk was all torn to pieces! Instead of a sidewalk, there were dozens of concrete blocks.

“Penny, somebody tore up that rebellious sidewalk and replaced it, poorly I might add, with cement blocks.”

“Why would they do that?”

“I have no idea.”

After getting off the phone, he used the camera feature, took a photo and sent it to Penny. It wouldn’t be long before she considered changing her name from Penny, to Dollar. That picture would soon make them very rich.

Meanwhile, the CEO of the company that owned that strange sidewalk, came up the street to his parking space. He saw the blocks.

“Jumping Cowbells! It works!”

Actually it worked better than promised and that is why Jim’s photo made him rich. The company that owned that concrete slab was ACME (All Concrete Materials Enterprises) and they sold concrete blocks. The poured the concrete for that sidewalk as a test of a new type of cement called Self-Procreating Concrete. It works!

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5 Comments »

  1. Only you could come up with this one. This is very good. I for one know just what you can and will do.

    Comment by ahartson53@gmail.com — February 15, 2009 @ 5:15 pm | Reply

  2. […] Jared Newman placed an observative post today on Unanswered QuestionsHere’s a quick excerpt “What the…?” “What’s the problem Jim?” “I was taking a walk during my break. But when I stepped on that sidewalk across the street, it started to vibrate and acted like Mrs. Cavendish when she was pregnant. I stepped back onto the street and it seemed to settle down.” “Ok Jim. When you get off the phone, get a cold drink because the heat is getting to you.” “I’m not the only one that’s noticed this Penny.” He was right. The sidewalks around the area were acting funny. It wasn’t long befor […]

    Pingback by Topics about Humoristic and Funny stuff » Archive » Unanswered Questions — February 15, 2009 @ 5:21 pm | Reply

  3. Ron, you know how to write and you always make me smile with your writing. Hey dude – where’s the “Tweet This” button – I’d definitely twitter this out!

    Comment by Marvin D Wilson — February 15, 2009 @ 6:24 pm | Reply

  4. […] Unanswered Questions « UNWRITER Ron Berry […]

    Pingback by Unanswered Questions « UNWRITER Ron Berry | sellconcrete.com — February 15, 2009 @ 10:22 pm | Reply

  5. Another inanimate object comes to life by the magic of Ron Twain! Cool, Ron!

    Comment by Carol — February 16, 2009 @ 6:32 am | Reply


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