March 1, 2009

Tra La La

Filed under: humor — unwriter1 @ 9:04 pm

Top Rated Automotive Live Auto Linguistics Association
(TRA LA LA)”Honk”

“Aw shut up”

“Hooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnkkkkkkkkkkk!! Get back in your own lane!”


“License and registration please.”

“Shut your vehicle off and step out of the car.”

A few minutes later.

“It says you’re clean. You may go with just a warning.”

“Thanks officer.”

John started the car and put it in gear. Suddenly the car door opened, the seat belt released and the seat tipped enough to drop John on the ground. At that point the door closed and the car jerked forward.

“What the …?”

“Mister, who’s driving? I thought you were alone.”

“I was!”

Unknown to John and the officer, John’s car had connected with the laptop computer that was in the car. At that point, it signed up for KUTE, Kar University Training Enterprise. By registering with its VIN number, it learned how to drive without a human involved. It was a very intense course but John’s car was an eight-cylinder fuel injected machine with overdrive. There was plenty of power for learning.

Ole Heavy Chevy, as his instructors called him, that he graduated with the highest possible honor. Yep, Heavy Chevy graduated Saudi Come Oily.

Heavy took night classes, while John slept. He practiced when no one was around. Granted John questioned the fuel gauge, but assumed the vehicle was getting older and losing efficiency. Then came graduation night. Heavy got home only an hour before John got up.

Shaking their heads in disbelief, they watched the car weave down the road. As the officer reached for his mike to call in, the speaker crackled.

“Be on the lookout for police vehicle 110. It is unmanned.”

Before either man could say a word, a siren wailed in the distance, heading their way.

“Heavy Chevy, pull over and shut down your engine!”

John and the cop rushed up behind the unmanned police vehicle. John was heading towards his car when the officer called him over. He was holding a printout.

“Heavy Chevy went to celebrate his graduation. The gas tank was empty. They got it filled with the only ‘fuel’ available, cheap vodka. Heavy Chevy is under arrest for Driving under the Influence.”

“I’m sorry John. I’ll give you a ride home. But your car will have to be impounded for thirty days.”

He grabbed the mike and called the tow truck.


  1. LOL. This is great. I had wondered…

    Comment by Heidi Thomas — March 1, 2009 @ 9:22 pm | Reply

  2. This is sooo cute. Great story Ron!! Now I know what my old blazer does when we are asleep. Thank you for answering that question.

    Comment by Terre — March 1, 2009 @ 9:41 pm | Reply

  3. This story is just kicking into high gear!

    Comment by Marvin D Wilson — March 2, 2009 @ 8:06 am | Reply

  4. As if John’s car driving by itself is not bad enough–how do I tell John that his car has been dating mine while we all sleep? Hmmm. Cute story!

    Comment by gigi1953 — March 2, 2009 @ 3:33 pm | Reply

  5. So now I have to worry about what my PT Cruiser is doing while I sleep? I thought the topper was when I tried to answer my email from the group and my Yahoo site sent them to my spam folder!

    This was a great blog, thank you.


    Comment by cruizen4u (Cindy) — March 4, 2009 @ 10:41 pm | Reply

  6. Good stuff

    Comment by Oris — March 9, 2009 @ 4:46 pm | Reply

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