UNWRITER Ron Berry

October 6, 2009

The Zombie Cookbook Tour!

Filed under: book tour — unwriter1 @ 8:36 pm
Tags: , , , ,

Ok everyone, as promised, here is the interview questions first, then the review for:

ZombieCookbook

Two of the other authors have also answered these questions, so please read the comments section also to get a more complete picture of the authors.

Interview questions for The Zombie Cookbook, edited by Kim Richards

Answers by Karina Fabian, author of “Wokking Dead” and “My Big, Fat, Zombie Wedding”

1. ‘Personally I won’t cook ghouls without at least a pound of curried and brandied dill weed. What’s your preferred spices?’ {Note: I asked this question before reading the book}

Lots of vinegar–it’s an antibacterial, after all.

2. Director Deutch Dors devised a devilishly dour movie deal. His grand scheme was to garishly gather ghouls, trap then zap zombies. Once they signed a contract, they were all shipped via the flying Dutchman, to an uninhabited and uninhabitable island thinking this was a new reality show. The reality was that they now were trapped. What would these hapless zombies do for fun?

Eat each others’ brains. After that, it wouldn’t matter. You can make brainless fun out of just about anything.

3. Dr. Duchess Doris developed a serum to cure the undead and protect the living. What was her secret ingredient?

4.

If we told you, it wouldn’t be a secret, would it?

5. A massive invasion as described in “The Zombie Cookbook” would surely cause ripples across all the realms. How would Vern handle the situation?

For those who may not knkow: Vern is a Faerie dragon, living in our world and eeeking out a living as a private detective with Sister Grace, a nun/mage, for a partner. They solve mysteries and save the world on an all-too regular basis. Their adventures can be found at http://www.dragoneyepi.net, where you can purchase their stories or order their books. I’ll let Vern answer this question for himself.

Vern: What is it with your humans and zombies? Imagine sticking a roast in the back of your fridge and forgetting it so long it decays, takes on a life of its own and comes back to exact revenge. Disgusting, right? Well, that’s how dragons feel about zombies. As for what I’d do: a liberal application of drake-style pyrotechnics, followed by a long bath and gargling.

6. If you ask a zombie out on a date, do you go ‘Dutch Treat’?

I think I’d ask for separate checks. Separate tables. Separate restaurants…

7. You’ve been hired as a private cook at a very good salary. However, your employer will only allow you to use three spices. What are they?

Cinnamon, pepper and dried essence of braaaaaiiiins.

8. A Zombie Cookbook had many sales but one person really liked it and offered you a special reward. As a group you’ve been invited to spend a week’s vacation, all expenses paid, on the space station, using the new tourist mode. You may each take five items. What five will you take?

Will I get cell phone reception up there? Either way, I’d take it, since I can take pictures and video, and write notes. Then I’d bring four things of my kids’ choosing, so they could have something that’s been in space. (I’d also wear Rob’s wedding band, so it will have been in space with me, too, but since I’d be wearing a ring, anyway, I don’t think that would count.)

This could be long since each of the authors may want a chance at these questions. To keep this post at less than novel length, I’ll stop here, with only one more question.

8. Take as much space as you want and please let our readers know where to buy A Zombie cookbook and anything else you want to say.

Purchase The Zombie Cookbook through Amazon or directly from the publisher at http://www.damnationbooks.com/book.php?isbn=9781615720378. It’s available in electronic and print format.

If you’d like to know more about my own writings, I invite you to check out my website, http://www.fabianspace.com.

I’d just like to close by letting you know that Vern is buying some Listerine as I write this and thanks you oh-so warmly for making him have to think about zombies. He really does have an aversion to them.

Title: The Zombie Cookbook

Author: Anthology

Publisher: Damnation Books, LLC.

Copyright: 2009

ISBN: Digital: 978-1-61572-037-8; Print: 978-1-61572-036-1

Format: Ebook, print

Genre: Humor

One had a spring hanging from his–

Oh, that’s just not right!

Welcome to the world of Zombies and the people who love them. That list includes all who like horror stories and macabre humor like Karina Fabian, the author of the opening quote. Zombies aren’t really funny (imagine your 8th grade math teacher coming back), or are they? The Zombie cookbook puts a totally new twist on the lives or rather lack thereof, of such creatures.

“”stay.”

“You have to say his name, or he won’t know you’re talking to him. They are simple-minded that way.””

As you may have noticed, Lisa Haselton has her own zombie problems. This particular undead one likes to work in kitchens. What will they think of next? Let’s read on, and find out.

‘It uses the eyeballs poached but there is a special chocolate sauce for dipping that I just can’t get right.”

I guess you have to ask Lin Neiswender for the right recipe. I haven’t found it yet, but I’m looking. I’m expecting company this weekend and this looks like just what I need for appetizers.

“You can add a sprig of moonflower or nightshade for a mellow datura-induced ambiance.”

Kate Sender thanked our most competent muse conference mistress, Lea Schizas and Kim Richards for this tasty dish.

“Spotting fresh meat, Richard’s dad lets go of his prey and starts crawling off the seat—he’s much faster than the old man.”

Dawn Marshallsay’s zombies are trained. Read all about it and watch your back (wrist, arm, legs, etc). They’re everywhere, they’re everywhere!

“Her eyeball fell in and bobbed around a moment before sinking.”

I guess Carla Girtman’s “Brain Food” doesn’t include cooking instructions. Hmm, maybe there’s a lesson or two here for all you zombies out there? Check it out.

“I saw the brains of the dead as a resource to be used, and came up with the following recipe after much experimenting.”

Well, this is a cookbook after all. This delightful tidbit comes from the creative mind of Scott Virtes. Are we hungry yet?

“It was more like chewing on a heavily-seasoned, greasy, car tire!”

Our poor zombies can’t even get a decent meal these days. Cinsearae Santiago did the research and discovered humans just ain’t what they used to be.

““My dear, he may be a little stiff, but he is, as they say, stiff.””

I’m not sure I would want to go on a double date with Karina Fabian. She can really ‘dig up’ some unusual dates. However, the good news is that she is just writing about a zombie wedding. The question that comes to mind is, What do you serve at the reception?

There you have it boys, girls and zombies. The zombie cookbook and assorted readings by all listed. I believe you will find this to be a great addition to any library, both humorous and horror. Pick up a few copies today and amaze your friends with your good ‘taste’ in books.

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9 Comments »

  1. Thanks for the interview and the review, Ron! I’m sorry more contributors didn’t answer the questions. They were fun.

    Comment by Karina Fabian — October 6, 2009 @ 9:00 pm | Reply

  2. Thoroughly enjoyed this zombified interview and the recipes – so out of this world! LOL. I knew Karina had a delightfully twisted imagination, but THIS – this raises the bar!

    Well put together feature, Mr. Twain – and Karina? Careful now, as John and Paul warned us back in the 60’s “You know that what you eat you are…” 😉

    Marvin D Wilson

    Comment by theoldsilly — October 7, 2009 @ 6:22 am | Reply

  3. Hi Ron,

    Thanks for reviewing The Zombie Cookbook. It has plenty of variety for those new to zombies, and those with too much experience. It also appeals to vegans and meat lovers alike. Something for everyone! I sent my answers to your questions several weeks ago, but here they are:

    1. ‘Personally I won’t cook ghouls without at least a pound of curried
    and brandied dill weed. What’s your preferred spices?’ {Note: I asked this
    question before reading the book}
    >>>Salt, mwahahahaha. Okay, seriously? I’m a vegetarian. Ghouls aren’t part of my diet. I’ll work with them in the kitchen, but that’s it.

    2. Director Deutch Dors devised a devilishly dour movie deal. His grand
    scheme was to garishly gather ghouls, trap then zap zombies. Once they
    signed a contract, they were all shipped via the flying Dutchman, to an
    uninhabited and uninhabitable island thinking this was a new reality show.
    The reality was that they now were trapped. What would these hapless zombies
    do for fun?
    >>>Play “Ghouls” (the hide-and-seek tag game), where they have to jump on or touch ‘home base’ before the zombie who is ‘it’ tags them. Last one to be found becomes dinner.

    3. Dr. Duchess Doris developed a serum to cure the undead and protect
    the living. What was her secret ingredient?
    >>>Soft lilac spritz perfume…a little dose will do ya.

    4. A massive invasion as described in “The Zombie Cookbook” would
    surely cause ripples across all the realms. How would Vern handle the
    situation?
    >>>(Will leave this one for Karina)

    5. If you ask a zombie out on a date, do you go ‘Dutch Treat’?
    >>>Since there won’t be a second date (I’m not a zombie and would most likely become the meal), it doesn’t really matter who pays.

    6. You’ve been hired as a private cook at a very good salary. However,
    your employer will only allow you to use three spices. What are they?
    >>>Lemon pepper, cinnamon, garlic

    7. A Zombie Cookbook had many sales but one person really liked it and
    offered you a special reward. As a group you’ve been invited to spend a
    week’s vacation, all expenses paid, on the space station, using the new
    tourist mode. You may each take five items. What five will you take?
    >>>Notebook, pen(s), camera, battery charger, salt.

    The Zombie Cookbook is full of great ingredients, I hope folks will check it out. 🙂

    Comment by Lisa Haselton — October 7, 2009 @ 7:21 am | Reply

  4. Hello Ron,

    Many thanks for your review of our book. Your questions were wittier than my story, “The Right Recipe”- I am so jealous! Wish I had found them earlier, but I hope it’s not too late to respond!

    1. ‘Personally I won’t cook ghouls without at least a pound of curried
    and brandied dill weed. What’s your preferred spices?’ {Note: I asked this
    question before reading the book}
    >>>Liquid Smoke, Garlic Salt, and Worcestershire Sauce to give those zombie riblets the just off the grill tang and fall off the bone flavor! Ghoulishly delightful.

    2. Director Deutch Dors devised a devilishly dour movie deal. His grand
    scheme was to garishly gather ghouls, trap then zap zombies. Once they
    signed a contract, they were all shipped via the flying Dutchman, to an
    uninhabited and uninhabitable island thinking this was a new reality show.
    The reality was that they now were trapped. What would these hapless zombies
    do for fun?
    >>>Getting into the spirit of camping, they toast eyeballs over a roaring campfire while singing “Kumbaya” sonmewhat off-key. Oops, zombies get too close to fire, fire bad, zombies lurch away, play “hide-in-jungle” till next day.

    3. Dr. Duchess Doris developed a serum to cure the undead and protect
    the living. What was her secret ingredient?
    >>>New Improved Double Aluminum Anti-Zombie-Perspirant, guaranteed to repell stink for two weeks or your money back. (Offer may not be valid in US Virgin Islands.)

    4. A massive invasion as described in “The Zombie Cookbook” would
    surely cause ripples across all the realms. How would Vern handle the
    situation?
    >>>With a sarcastic remark and a flip of that dragon tail before saving the day with the good Sister.

    5. If you ask a zombie out on a date, do you go ‘Dutch Treat’?
    >>>It’s really a moot point as the datee has to be kept at arms length with a baseball bat, kind of hard to do at your local movie theater. A tractor-pull, maybe.

    6. You’ve been hired as a private cook at a very good salary. However,
    your employer will only allow you to use three spices. What are they?
    >>>Eye of newt, mandrake root, and Bubba’s Blow Your Head Off Chilis.

    7. A Zombie Cookbook had many sales but one person really liked it and
    offered you a special reward. As a group you’ve been invited to spend a
    week’s vacation, all expenses paid, on the space station, using the new
    tourist mode. You may each take five items. What five will you take?
    >>>Zombie repellant (you never know when you might need it), change of undies, laptop, video camera, Tic Tacs.

    –Lin Neiswender

    Comment by Lin Neiswender — October 7, 2009 @ 5:22 pm | Reply

  5. “Cinnamon, pepper, and dried essence of braaaaiiiins.”

    I’m sorry, but as the zombies number one fan (yes, I am an admitted zombie lover) braaaiiiins is mis-spelled.

    It should be braaaaiiiinZ.

    There.

    See?

    That’s much better isn’t it?

    And now my inner zombie psyche is soothed once again.

    Has anyone seen my eyeball?

    Ha!

    Great review and quite intriguing!

    Comment by quirkyloon — October 8, 2009 @ 8:01 am | Reply

  6. Thanks for the review and being part of the VBT. I’m thrilled that you enjoyed The Zombie Cookbook. It’s such a fun subject!

    Comment by Kim Richards — October 18, 2009 @ 1:14 pm | Reply

  7. Let me throw the truly amazing situation into relief once again. ,

    Comment by Arnold38 — October 22, 2009 @ 4:19 am | Reply

  8. There is no sharing That does not lead to a project. ,

    Comment by Barbara10 — October 23, 2009 @ 3:47 am | Reply


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